What are you going to do when you retire?

So I retired.

I was counting days, months, years for about 3 years before it actually happened. From the time I started working, I planned to retire on my 62nd birthday.
I live alone, I have no dependents, I have no one to whom I must consult or with whom I must agree or compromise. That was my plan and I carried it out with sheer perfection.

About six months before the BIG DAY, folks started asking me "What are you going to do when you retire?"
In those early days, I would respond, "Oh, I don't know, volunteer work, travel, read, etc, etc..."
Then I started changing the answers, "Oh, I think I will move to Hawaii, marry a prince from a small country in Africa who emailed me, join the rodeo..."
Soon, my standard response was "Throw out my pantihose, and shoot my alarm clock..."
Finally, in a moment of exasperation, I started saying, "I have NO IDEA!!"
And I didn't. I had never retired before. I had never taken more than 2 weeks vacation from work. I had conformed to a schedule since that day in 1952 when Mom pointed toward the grade school and I trundled off to fulfill my first obligation.

It would be like asking someone what they will have for dinner on August 22, ten years hence.

So I retired.